Bastardized Illness

Why you shouldn't talk about your medical status over beer:

Someone: Hey, where you at?
AR: Bro, I on 2 week MC man.
Someone: How come man!
AR: Slipdisc.
Someone: Oh!

After the gossip had made the rounds round the tables.

Me: Eh, where's AR? Don't think he'd miss this party though?
Someone Else: You don't know ah, He 2 week MC.
Me: Oh how come?
Someone Else: Syphilis bro.
Me: SERIOUS boh?
Someone Else: See see he just walked in, haha. speak of the devil. by the way, do you think his crotch looks swollen?
Me: ...