Conjunction-itis

I am not totally prepared to push out the new place post because I'd like it to be more comprehensive than what I already have at hand. All I will say for starters is that I have not felt such pride ever before. Not even topping the PSLE at my school, nor my commissioning parade.

In other news, apart from the Sumatran earthquake [like it doesn't happen all the time for there to be a furore now], my entire family was hit with conjunctivitis. One of the perils of driving a cab for 12 hours a day is that you end up ingesting a whole lotta germs and bacteria you wouldn't have come into contact with. This in conjunction with the already aching right and left feet and back and butt. I is feel my "lao pa's" pain.

So, I turned up at home to get the final stuff. All boxed up and ready to go. A bit saddening really, that in 24 years, all my worldly possessions only filled 3 big boxes and a cart [computer stuff]. My mum had this cool eyeglasses on. The word that flashed through my mind was "pimp". In fact "a clockwork orange" also came to mind. Bottomline? They were hideous. Oval BLUE lenses. She looked like a fashion disaster. I had to rescue her. So, I fished out my never used Ray Bans [filched off one of the Malay blokes who end up losing their accessories when they gain more alcohol] and placed it on her. Now, she looked good. Like a first class fashion icon good enough to share the stage with Sting or Bono in one of their charity concerts.

Candid Shot. Attempt 1.

Posed shot. After adjusting her top, gold chain and grinning for the phone camera.

The dad however had already procured a pair of shades that kinda set alive his film star fantasies. Problem was, he took great offence that I said he resembled MGR. He was a die-die Sivaji fan. The only bit I couldn't fathom was that he kept complaining the flashlight I was testing out wasn't bright enough. Duh? You're wearing shades!


So, trying not to look into their eyes, I kinda cleaned house and ciaoed. All was well till my eye started to ache. A coupla eyedrops later I thought I was clean and retired for the night. Bad mistake. One puffy eyed shanker got up in the morning. The blokes at school all but had to threaten to beat up on me to get me to go to the doctor's. So, I did.

Story still hasn't ended. Now, the girlfriend is also sore-eyed and dazed and thinking of how best to escape the drudgery of work life. I is feel her pain too. In fact, I feel the pain of all sore eyed mofos in the world. Now all that's left to do is to punish the evil "I can undress you with my eyes" looking foreign workers in my block. I'll get to that later. A little discharge on all the lift buttons should do the trick.

Live evil.

Since, I haven't entertained for long. Do enjoy these links I managed to find and waste more company time doing your private stuff. Because, you're worth it.

1. You know how pissed we get when someone in the USA still thinks Singapore is a part of China? Run through here to see other "myths" of doofuses around the world. Amazing stuff, HERE.

2. Whatever happened to "wax on wax off" Karate Kid? For more of "where are they now?" trivia, browse this site, HERE.

Adieu!