Flower Power

Since announcing, publicizing, conning people to host the button and receiving orders and enquiries, I've noticed that the Evil Singapore Consumer is still very alive and kicking. I'd love to have put the blame on Yindian consumers but heck, across the board, everyone gives shit anyhow. They are who I term, blooming idiots. I put to you a few scenarios:

Me: Hi
A: Hi, noticed you selling flowers.
Me: Yep.
A: Ok, do you have a shop?
Me: No.
A: Ah, then I don't feel confident giving you my money. What if........ it doesn't come out the way I want or you don't send the thing. Is there any receipt?
Me: Well, I can give you an official receipt with my company name. Otherwise, we've never once not fulfilled an order. And that's my personal guarantee.
A: Ah well, I still quite unsure about giving you my money.
Me: Then you can take your business elsewhere.
A: But you guys are so cheap.
Me: So, what's the problem again?
A: Urmz, I'll give you a call back.

A never does. The next one is by e-mail.

B: Hi, I want to order XXX roses.
Me: Ok, it will be this much and can I have the delivery address please?
B: Ok, I want it to look exactly like this. [Attaches a photo that is swiped off a very prominent online florist]
Me: But, mine is not like that. What I have close to that is this. [Attach catalogue photo]
B: Urm ok. Well, then I want each rose to have its individual netting and it's not to be too big and preferably pink or white. Also, I want a ribbon that is this colour and it's to be tied this way.
Me: All our bouquets are beautifully crafted and our workmanship is top notch. I don't think you have much to worry about. So will I expect your money in? Is this a confirmed order?
B: Yes about that. I can't do a bank transfer. Can you give me your address so I can pay you direct?
Me: Well to transfer is much more convenient. But yeah, you can come over.
B: Ok then.

I've never heard from B since. Then again, there are those who make your life all the more simpler, like my Melayu friend.

C: So what are you up to these days?
Me: Flowers la. For V Day.
C: Always up to something.
Me: You want?
C: Ok, let's see. I got 50 bucks. Plus delivery what can I get from you?
Me: I give you the best I can for your 40 lor. That's about a dozen roses.
C: Good enough. Here's the dough. I'll give you the address later.
Me: Nice doing business with you. Ciao.

And then there are the ones who go for odd numbers to either signify an anniversary or because they figure in some nook and cranny of their mind that it's actually the cool thing to do. My take on a woman's mind is of course what I get out of my girlfriend. And her theory is that, women are more concerned with the number of roses rather than the different type or the arrangement or the colours. Anyone with less than a dozen is the ultimate Scrooge McDuck and should be disrespected as a member of the male species.

I agree. So, quit asking about stalks that number less than 12 and get your budgets higher people. If you do need a guide on significance by number and colour, here it is. Make an informed choice. You have my digits.

1 stalk - Love at 1st Sight
2 stalks - Mutual Feelings
3 stalks - I Love You
7 stalks - I am Infatuated by You
9 stalks - Together as Long as We Live
10 stalks - You are Perfect
11 stalks - You are My Treasured One
12 stalks - Be My Steady
13 stalks - Friends Forever
15 stalks - I am Sorry
20 stalks - I am Sincere Towards You
21 stalks - I am Committed to You
36 stalks - I Will Remember Our Romantic Moments
40 stalks - My Love is Genuine
99 stalks - I Will Love You Till the Day I Die
100 stalks - I am Totally Devoted to You
101 stalks - You are My One and Only
999 stalks - My Love Will Last Till the End of Time

Red - I love you or Encouragement
White - You are heavenly, reverence of innocence & purity
Pink - You are gentle & graceful
Light Pink - Gratitude & appreciation
Dark Pink - Admiration & sympathy joy & gladness
Orange - Enthusiasm
Blue - You are special
Purple - You are my romance
Yellow - Joy, Gladness, Freedom
Two Roses - Joined Together, Engagement
Red and White Roses - Together Unity

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