The Departed

This is way overdue but a recent discussion about this movie with sheepman made me wanna put this up now instead of letting it die a slow death in my "drafts". A remake of Infernal Affairs 1, Hollywood style. Well, Hollywood, you fucked it up. Big time! Even the likes of Scorsese couldn't save this.

What I was meant to use to watch this flick:

Thank you MTV. But, these Mon-Wed only terms and conditions were a right pain in the arse. Especially when it's highly rare I even leave my house on non-drinking days. So, BitTorrent to the rescue it is. And I finally caught this anomaly of a movie on the circuit. Verdict? IT sucked.

Why did The Departed Suck?

1. Irish versus the Police - Where in the world do you equate Irish hoods as having the same modus operandi and style as the HK triads?

2. Casting - Jack Nicholson is the wrong man for the job. The right man would have been Al Pacino or equivalent. Matt Damon cannot make it. Leo is too pretty to be wannabe gangster, emotionless prick. Martin Sheen is too old to pull off this role. His death was meant to induce poignancy but the scene was so muted it was a fucked up climax to it all. The actor who oughta have played Sheen's role should have been a middle aged bloke with much of his life left to live. If you recall, in Infernal Affairs, Sheen's counterpart had only just got his first child, a daughter.

3. Music - Music makes movies sometimes. A good sountrack is all it takes to carry a piss poor film sometimes and The Departed totally missed the point on it. HK movies are so darn dependant on music backing up important plot scenes. Hollywood unfortunately is probably just watching the bottomline and royalties to music artistes.

End of the day, don't attempt a remake even if you have big name signings if you aren't up to it.

Frank Costello: When I was your age they used to say you could become cops or criminals. What I'm saying to you is this... When your facing a loaded gun, what's the difference?

Billy Costigan: [to Frank Costello] You accuse me once, I put up with it. You accuse me twice... I quit. You pressure me to fear for my life and I will put a bullet in your head as if you were anybody else. Okay?

Ellerby: [on Sullivan getting married] Marriage is an important part of getting ahead. It lets people know you're not a homo. A married guy seems more stable. People see the ring, they think "at least somebody can stand the son of a bitch." Ladies see the ring, they know immediately that you must have some cash, and your cock must work.

For an actually intellectual deeper than skin-deep review, I defer to AVB's take on it.

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