Tuition Woes

Signs your Tuition Kid is conning you

1. When you open the lesson, he asks you random questions. These can range from buying an electric guitar, your handphone, his handphone, that girl he saw at recess to the girl you are SMSing at that precise moment.

2. He always insists on running errands. Like, getting your coffee and vadai and then launching into the history, geography and literature of making the perfect vadai [Cue: Praise his mummy tons]. I must admit the vadai was solid. Not dry inside but just a little moist.

3. He presses something on his calculator comes up with the answer "57" but only writes "7" down on the paper.

4. He does a test paper, but every few questions, he tells you it's not in the syllabus. Lan lan you have to trust the bugger right. So, you end up skipping half the paper. Though you remind him, that if he's conning you it doesn't matter, cos you get paid anyway, he still wants to con you.

5. He insists that you give him work to do when you're about to leave. But it won't get done anyhow. Cos, that's the "query" he wants to ask you about the next time you come around.

Moral of the story? I really have no qualms getting paid 25 an hour to keep a little boy company. I think I'm worth it.

On a highly different note, it has been a very very haywire week. I think all those who know why it was so, you do. I am also going to induct myself into an Isolationist Policy, made famous to history by the Tokugawa Shogunate in Japan. And it's gonna be about a month to the exams, try not to distract me away from my books thanks. Cos, I easily am. I don't care if your pet hamster just gave birth and you don't know how to stop its parents from gobbling them up, if I say "I'm studying" put down the phone/keyboard and wait till I come back. If I don't, it just means I wanna be isolated from you, yes you.

Also, can everyone stop getting infected with trivial-itis? If it's trivial, just buang. Don't sweat the small stuff. It's very very irritating when you end up involving everyone else in that sphere in it too. Step back, and go "1.........2.............3...........Fuck it!". And then whack 2 stouts and go to bed. Simple. Wake up. Sun is shining. Problem is solved. If the problem is still regarding your hamster, I hope to God the parents are done with their meal and spat out the bones.

If the problem is not your hamster, but something I could do without. Then please let me do without it. You know some smart aleck teacher always spouts this out, "If you don't try, you'll never succeed"? Yes. Follow that. And also follow this from another smart aleck:

Steve Urkel: Ms Steuben, you taught Laura to slow down and stop taking short cuts. And you taught Cassie Lynn Nubbles, the posterchild for useless people, how to do things for herself. And, my God, look what you've done to Waldo. Do you have any idea how much you changed him?

Ms. Steuben: Well, I guess he's changed a little.

Steve Urkel: A little? Why, because of you, he's swapping recipes with Wolfgang Puck. And, he's got something that he didn't have before. Self respect.

Quote courtesy: imdb.com

I know a Laura, I know a Cassie Lynn Nubbles and I also know a Waldo. God bless me. Now, do I have to be your Ms. Steuben or can you bozos go find your own?


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